Tag Archives: Friends

Friends, How Many Of Us Have Them?

There are different breeds of human beings on this planet earth. I have been opportuned to meet quits a few in my over four decades of existence. Now, this is not extolling, nor targeting any particular individual or individuals but an attempt within the ambience of my experiential interaction to compartmentalize and sort of document certain behavioral characteristics that I have come across.

These individuals in perspective are/were colleagues, friends or relations. Now I like to say here again that the impact may be north or south bound (that’s an expression I recently picked up from a friend of mine) depending on how the person in the question received it and the extent it is allowed. I once heard this from a famous preacher some years back; If some throws you into a pit and attempts to cover you up, each time he/she throws dirt at you, just shake it off and step on it. In no time you will be out of the ditch!

Now to those friends, there are those you don’t see in months, years and when you call or meet, it is like you haven’t missed out on anything. You pick up instantly and you talk just about everything and anything heartily and cheerfully and then the break again, but no hard or ill feelings!

Those you call friends and you really don’t want to talk to them but somehow, you just have to. So you are on red alert each time you engage them in any form. You are so careful you almost need a lawyer by your side to validate what you say or need to say. The reason is simple, this friend or friends cares less about you, not one bit, he/she is just collecting stuffs about you and will sooner use them against you. It is like collecting points to spend at the supermarket. You might say why care about such people, after all, when people talk about you there is a reason. Yes that is correct, right or wrong reasons, it can be either. Painful point though is that you really didn’t think this the information they unwittingly gathered about you will be used to their advantage.

Those you call friends and they compete with you, ever step you take is a challenge for them. Healthy competition is fine mind you. But these category of friends just want to keep you down there. When they see opportunity that may be beneficial to you even when they can’t use it in a million years, but because it may take you above them or bring you at par, they refuse to hand it to you. They are all about themselves and even go out of their way to check on your progress once in a while, just to be sure you haven’t caught up. At times they offer to help you out on stuff and deliberately sabotage it or stall it. They even advise you wrongly just to ensure you arrive later than expected at the finish line. These friends rub it in at every opportunity they get, they are the “I told you so” people.

Those you call friends and they look out for you. They are like, have you tried this? have you seen this? The go out of their way for you when you need help. Your secret is safe with them and you can share knowing they won’t tell. They will stand for you even when you are wrong and chide you later. They won’t talk bad about you even for the glory of it. If they ever have to call you to order, just know you have truly reached your limit and something needs to be done quickly. Telling you the truth has never been a difficult thing for them and being yourself with them is like second nature. These category of friends don’t compete with you. They are like a brother/sister, no, sometimes better! They are very few of them around and not many of us have them.

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Posted by on May 29, 2013 in Personal


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Patience Is A Virtue! – Part II

“I have three choices; Prosperity, Procreation and Patience. Three days I have to choose one, on the third day I am to present my choice to Him”, the man thought aloud. How could it be that I am faced with these choices? And yet, all expediently desirable, if I choose one will the others be banished from my life?

For several years we have prayed to God for a child in this home, why is the answer coming in this way? The man continued. Surely I must consult, but first let me speak with my wife he concluded.

And so the man called his wife and narrated the story to her. She jumped and shouted, she praised and worshiped God for answered prayers. “Husband surely of a truth, God does hears and answers prayers, we must choose Procreation. We have waited this long, we are also not getting any younger, time is no longer on our side. Finally, I can now be called a mother, no longer will I face the shame of walking alone in the market with all the side murmurings”, she went on and on. “Husband, we must choose procreation”, she said with a note of finality. The husband thanked her.

The next day the man made his way to see his father, “My father, God has finally heard our prayers . . . .”, the father quickly interjected, “You mean your wife has finally conceived?”.

No father, he responded. He also narrated the story to the father as he earlier did to the wife. “Well, in that case you should choose prosperity. Both of you are already advanced in age, no need to complicated her situation. With Prosperity, you can buy houses, horses, marry more wives, younger ones and they will bear you children. And you can buy that horse I told you about for me”, this was the father’s response for advice. The man looked up and down, sighed deeply, thanked the father and left.

On the third and the last day, the man called his trusted friends and tabled the matter before them. Their advices varied between all three choices with none being convincing. They all left it hanging saying, “It is you who feels it that will know where it pains most, the decision is yours”. With this, he went to bed on the last night, not being able to sleep much because of the great pending decision that lies ahead.

It is morning and in the presence of the Almighty, the man with a heavy heart and a decided mind knelt and poured out forth, “I have listened to the counsel of man, I sought for wisdom to take this decision. Though painful it is, wait I must on my God, Patience must I choose since it has taken me this far! I believe if I continue to persevere, if I continue to wait, if I am Patient, I will receive the promises of this union!”, So I choose Patience.

The father was livid with rage, friends were neither here nor there. “You know you should have chosen Procreation to allow peace reign in the house, imagine how long your wife had waited before now”, one friend said. “Now your father will disown you, your only chance to become rich and famous and possibly marry a young and beautiful wife who will give you an heir, you blew it”, another sneered at him. But because Patience has moved in with them, himself and the wife were calm. They continued to wait with prayers as they had always done.

One morning, not too long after this great decision, Procreation went into the presence of Almighty,”My Lord, you know that I am the closest to Patience, it is common knowledge that where ever she goes I go with her. Since her departure I have not been myself and with each passing day, I am more convinced that I want to be with her”.

Almighty thought long and hard, this was bound to happen. Procreation and Patience have always been close, Prosperity had other friends like Good-health and Hope despite his affiliation to Patience and Procreation. Prosperity should be able to survive on his own, it is time to let Procreation join her friend, Patience.

And so the Almighty quietly rewarded the man’s Patience with Procreation!

The man, his wife, friends and relations rejoiced not quite long after. With the embrace of Patience, they have been blessed with not just one, but two children. Procreation has stamped her signature too. The news was everywhere, it was unbelievable! “That was not part of his choice, how come?” That was a neighbour’s question.

Soon, Prosperity became restless, he wanted to join his friends and in grand style too. “I have always wanted to bring Good-health into our friendship circle, now is my opportunity”, he thought. He sought audience with Almighty.

My God, with each passing day I feel the urge to join my friends. I see the happiness and joy they have created in the family within the short period they have been there. I want to contribute my own quota in consolidating it. I also want to go with Good-health if you will permit. These were the words of Prosperity. The Almighty looked at Prosperity and Good-health. He saw the eagerness and determination in them. He did not need further deliberation before granting it.

He asked Hope, ”would you want to join them too?”

Hope replied, “My God, I will rather remain here, others will need me”.

And so, the man, his wife and children with Patience became prosperous and lived in good health all the days of their lives. And the story ends here!

As it was in those times, so it is now, and so shall it continue to be.

It pays to be patient!


Posted by on February 14, 2013 in Personal


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Do my friends really like me?

I have been making friends since I could walk. The cat in my house was my very first friend; I remember vividly how soothing its furs feels on my skin when it curls to sleep beside me. My mum would kick it away from me to which I used to wonder why, though I cringe at the thought now.

When I started primary school (don’t laugh at me, I was not one of those ajebos who went to kindergarten/nursery), there was this bully who could redesign your dentition because you did not share with him your lunch. My strategy was to establish a friendly relationship with another classmate who wasn’t so bright but stronger than the bully. The arrangement was okay for all three of us, as long as I don’t get beaten, I will help out with the kinder bully’s home work,

In secondary school, now you are wiser and begin to understand friendship from an advantageous point of view, more of what is in it for me (Wii FM). There were those you strike a deal of relationship with for the fun things you get the opportunity to share together. There are those who just like you and are happy with you for who you are. And then, there are those who you like to be friends with and they don’t even know you exist (usually the opposite sex).

My point?

We make friends for different reasons, well that’s how I see it from my side. What I’ll like to know is “Do your friends give a damn about you?”

Answer these questions and you can make up your mind afterwards (thank me later).

How often do you and your friends fight?
• Once or twice a month!
• All the time!
• You don’t know what to argue about!

How many of your friends know where you live?
• Some of them
• All of them or most of them
• They don’t care!
• What house?!

How often do you and your friends eat lunch together?
• About twice a week!
• Why would they do that?!
• They don’t even know you go to their school
• As much as possible!

How long is an average phone call between you and one of your friends?
• Over an hour!
• They don’t know my number!
• About five minutes and that’s so they can know where its happening this Friday
• Between thirty and fifty- nine minutes!

What word would you use the most to describe your friends?
• Is there a word to describe my friends?
• Yes, AWESOME!!!!!!!
• EVIL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
• I don’t know, is there?
• Nice? I guess

Your friend asks for your girl/boyfriend’s or wife/husband’s number, do you give him/her?
• We don’t flow along that line!
• No, but why the heck does he/she wants it?
• Yes, but give the wrong number
• Uhmm… is this a trick question?

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Posted by on June 20, 2012 in Personal


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